Hasib Ur Rashid Ifti

Therapist: This is November 11, 2021 and your third session of this month. State your name and profession for the recordings. Just a mere formality.

Sadman: I’m Sadman Sakib. I was one of the youth actors for the telco giant GamlaLink. Now I stay at home, usually deleting their promotional texts.

T: Alright, let’s start. You said you’ve been having trouble sleeping lately?

S: Mostly. Sometimes when I do get some sleep, I hear those jingles, those words in my head. They never stop.

T: What words, Sadman?

S: Words like “Yo”, “Chill”, “Yaar”... You can almost sense the desperation to relate to the youth through words people believe are relevant.

T: Your mother said you still dance in your sleep?

S: When I get some sleep, that is. Others would dance to celebrate the most random events and so did I. This one time, Raisa came back to campus after dropping a semester owing to some personal tragedy. But then this other girl told her everything is going to be alright because GamlaLink announced a new internet plus SMS bundle. And then they all started dancing.

T: These dancing people, Sadman... What else do you remember about them?

S: They high-five randomly, almost like they ran out of things to celebrate. It was fine at first, but it got a bit insensitive when this guy high-fived me at my grandma’s funeral. They’d come to my house early in the morning, splash water on me to wake me up and make cute friendship videos to put on the internet. Pranks look adorable online, but I couldn’t sleep in fear of being woken up to a mob of selfie-obsessors.

T: Do you think that’s how your sleeping disorder began?

S: Maybe. Even after being on campus together for eight hours, they’d get back home, video chat and not shut up about how fast GamlaLink internet is.

T: You said this made you lose your friends and family--

S: I danced to GamlaLink jingles for a living, so obviously my family was ashamed of me. I lost my old friends. In any serious crisis, I’d just advise them to switch to GamlaLink 4G. Naturally, they abandoned me.

T: And I suppose this desertion affected your grades as well?

S: Between morning dance routines on campus, chaotic evening hangouts and mandatory house parties at night, I couldn’t study and eventually dropped out. That same year, my girlfriend dumped me and my parents separated. You know when I realised I’ve had enough, though?

The therapist waits for an answer.

S: After I told my new best friend about my misery, he kept his hand on my shoulder and told me to chill because GamlaLink was now offering a 1 paisa per second call rate. And as I sat in my parents’ old room staring at framed pictures of my once happy family, they kept on dancing around me. That’s when I knew it was over.

Suggest Ifti non-fictions at hasiburrashidifti@gmail.com

Photo: Orchid Chakma