Osama R Kalam, Tactless

Correspondent

Turkmenistan yesterday imposed a ban on Covid-22, declaring the virus would never be allowed in the country anymore.

In far-reaching measures, the government of Turkmenistan also decided to put a gag order on anyone speaking about the “so-called virus”.

Plainclothes policemen have begun patrolling the streets in hopes of eavesdropping on coffee shop revolutionaries who dare to discuss the banned disease among themselves.

Furthermore, all mention of the word has been erased from all forms of communication, including on television channels, radios and newspapers. An attempt was also made to trademark the name and cleanse it from the internet entirely, but since this wasn’t America, that move did not pan out so well.