Bangladesh crosses the red line and uses chemical weapons on its people. Will there be a US air strike?

Oh, formalin! All that glitters is not gold. That is applicable especially to those shiny apples that remain shiny forever - just like Amitabh Bachchan. As a kid, he probably fell in a cauldron of formalin just as Obelix did in a cauldron of magic potion.

For us mere mortals, we eat, love and pray that we have

money to pay the medical bills. That is because it is not a question of whether we get sick, but a choice of what we get sick with. In other words, it is not a question of staying healthy, but it is a question of picking the disease we like.

Sigh! The fruits and vegetables in the seventies made us Mohammad Ali. Today, the same food turn us into Chemical Ali.

Is this our new healthy diet motto: "No apple a day, keeps the doctor away"?

So, what happens to the Samsung smart refrigerator, designed to track the expiration dates of the contents inside them, when it hits the Bangladesh market? Will it explode?

With all the formalin consumption, we are running on borrowed time. Even when that time is over, our bodies will stay preserved for another hundred years. I wonder if this was the secret of the Ancient Egyptians.

Now, what do we do? The good news is that you don't have to buy a fancy gadget. Just submerge the fruit or vegetables in warm saline water for a few hours and then wash them in clean water. Now, the question is, what about the water itself? The tap water, if available (even when there is no water in the tap in the bathroom, for some reason, it is always on the floor...) is surely and rightfully recycled, but the question is, whether they are purified in the process. Hey, how about we drink it -could be an alternative to a non-gym, non-starving crash diet course!

As we have this Watergate to consider, use filtered or previously boiled water during the saline submersion stage and then again use boiled/filtered water to wash the vegetables.

Here's to your health!

Well, that's my public service announcement. I just hope this does not encourage the formalin squad to become a tad bolder.

For those who can afford it, they are willing to pay premium for fruit and vegetables that expire quickly. I guess that stems from the basic affinity towards term limits.

So, here's another easy way to win the hearts of the people. No, I don't mean an oborodh or hartal against formalin, but figure out a bullet proof, enforceable way of eradicating this disease, once and for all.

Let this be food for thought for the thoughts for food.

While the formalin cartel strives, all are welcome anytime at my house for a square meal. I will be sensible enough to cook the food thoroughly enough to frighten away the most determined bacteria. On the side, laughs are guaranteed. And who said that good food and jokes don't go together? My wife is there in case you need a Heimlich... The writer is an engineer & CEO turned comedian (by choice), the host of NTV's The Naveed Mahbub Show and the founder of Naveed's Comedy Club.

E-mail: naveed@naveedmahbub.com