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WRITE TO MITA
Dei Mita.
^1y dauipiter got married last year. She Is only 20 now and Is expecting. I am 42 and finding it very difficult to adjust to the thought of becoming a grandmother. 1 advised my daughter not to start a family so eady but she refused to listen to me. I am a working woman but my daughter expects me to look after the baby while she goes back to her studies. What should I do! My relatives criticize me for my attitude. Please advise.
Shtreen. Lalmatia. Dear Shtreen,
These questions are bound to emerge as more and more modern educated women try to shake off their traditional roles. There are two Issues here: 1) Your daughter's marriage and her desire to have a baby. 2) Your role as mother-in-law and grandmother. For the first you have no choice, she is an adult and these important decisions depend entirely on her and her husband. The second is your role as grandmother You too have a right to be independent and not to become burdened with looking after babies all over again Explain that very gently to your daughter.Chances are that when she does have the baby you will forget all the above hesitations and will be only too eager to look after ft. Still your wish should be respected by your daughter.
Dear Mita.
I fully agree with your advice given to a woman whose hus band has been having relations with other women for long. It Is sad that Kima of Ztgatola has disagreed with your advice. She has accused you by saying that your ideas are too western for our society I ask Rima how long will the woman tn question syffer In her coryugal l(fe? How much patience can she shin to preserve relation with her husband? Can't she expect a decent and happy Itfe? Mita, you are quite right in telling the woman that her husband will neier change and for this she should leave her husband. The woman can take final decision only when she can prepare herse{f to live on her own.
Md Delowar Hossain. North Shahjahanpur
Dear Hossain,
Thank you for the nice letter supporting my advice to the woman in question. Everyone Is entitled to his/her own views which are not necessarily wrong.
Dear Mita.
I am a student of class VII. My eyesight Is very poor ! have to use spectacles of — 3.00 constantly. But 1 am fed up with my glasses because these don't suit me. My mother Is also worrying about my eye sight.
After thinking a lot I made up my mind to use contact lenses, but some say it Is harmful, and It may cause infections in eyes. Now what I need Is a good advice from you
Sana Akbar. Khq)a Dewan. Dhaka
Dear Sana.
The doctor in our team says: There is no medical reason to have eye infection because of contact lenses. The most important thing is to keep the lenses clean by using the solution provided with the lenses. Some people who have allergy might suffer from Itching and irritation but this Is not due to contact lenses Be sure to sec a good eye doctor.
A ★ * ★
Dear Kamel.
I will not print your letter as instructed by you arxj will reply buy mall Just want to tell you that you have come a tong way In acknowledging your problem and coming to terms with It. Please try to see the positive aspect of your life such as your wife who will stand by you and give confidence and support The addition to the family will bring joy and happt ness coupled with responsibility AU this will help you realise finally all you need is to boost your self esteem