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WRITE TO MITA
Dear Mita.
I am a working mother who is struggling to run the household — look after my two children, being a good w(fe to my husband and doing a good Job at the office. Sometimes I find the pressure to be too much and feel like giving up on some of my duties. Since I cannot glue up being a mother and wife I might have to give up my Job. What do you have to say to that.
RtzwarucNakhalpara. Dhaka.
Dear Rizwana.
Most working mothers go through the pressure that you (ace today. Il Is nol easy and will never be easy, but that does not mean you should give up. What you have to do is bring a balance between work and home. Don't push yourself to the extent that you burn out. Take It easy, do the best you can and don't try to be a super woman — it's not worth it.
Dear Mita.
Are all daughter-in-law and mother-in-law relationships doomed to fail? I never thought It will happen to me but. unfortunately, after six months of marriage I am faced with the same problem. Though we don't live together she must interfere In everything I do and tries to run my l(fe through the telephone. Due to her prying questions I have stopped visiting her but she complains to my husband who forces me to go. What can I do to be free of her? Please advise.
Anonymous. Dhaka.
Dear Anonymous.
No. I don't believe that all such relationships are doomed to fall. However, this is a common phenomenon and Is an accepted fact In our society. This happens out of unrealistic expectations on both sides and also because some people like living up Io certain stereotypes. Since you don’t live with your mother-in-law It is better that you don't make such a big fuss about It. Try to find something positive about her, Il might help.
Dear Mila.
For five years I was trapped tn a marriage that was forced upon me by my parents and to which I could not adjust with. Recently we have separated and hope to get a divorce soon. My parents and all other relatives are totally against my decision and think 1 am crazy. My husband is rich, good looking and is not a bad person, but he is not for me. Somehow I have not been able to convince my patents of this. What should 1 do? Where can 1 get some support?
Anonymous. Chittagong.
Dear Anonymous.
You have taken a decision as an adult and I will certainly respect it as should everyone else. Hut please don't be too harsh on your parents. They mean well and must have arranged your marriage with your best Interest at heart. It Is unfortunate that fl did nol work. Most marriages arc still arranged in our culture and most are successful to some extent. It Is not often that a woman has the courage to break off just because she is unable to adjust. You have a tough journey ahead. Be brave and he firm, best of luck.
Dear Mtta.
I am very careless with my money and Jewellery and often lose them. This has often put me tn very awkward positions but I never learn. I continue to trust everyone and leave my money bag here and there. What can I do? Mease advise.
Shama Hussain. Dhaka.
Dear Shama.
Habits are very hard to change as you must know. Aa for trusting people, this Is not essentially a bad trait. Although trusting everyone Indiscriminately does cause problems, it is much better than being constantly suspicious of everyone. Barring few unpleasant incidents. I am sure, most of your experiences are pleasant and rewarding.